Most sex is just unconscious, mutual masturbation trying to relieve our pain and shame. Conscious sexuality is about the merging of ALL that we are and saying “here I am, take all of me, as I accept all of me and welcome all of you”…
In ancient shamanic traditions, the healer and the “sufferer” conjoin together to journey through the trauma where the shaman/healer deeply supports this releasing of terror in a profound and liberating way.
Hold her firmly, like the structure of a solid oak. That oak is unshaken by the wind, as is your integrity and capacity to hold for all of her.
That oak only shaped by the direction of its intention. Imagine your intention carrying the power of a thousand kings – trusted, revered and depended upon to be present.
In nurturing lovemaking, sex has the capacity to heal old trauma and wounds. As you witness each other in non-judging and vulnerable ways, the old may resurface to be released viscerally in a safe and supportive way.
We all strive for perfection in our own ways. For the masculine, it’s generally through a feeling of emptiness, freedom, and a sense of depth to the world. For the feminine it’s in fullness, feeling whole and connected to all things. It is both our conscious and unconscious expectations of perfection that fuel who we are and who we become. It is our recognition of the worth and intrinsic value of our soul that releases us from the catchment of our rigid or extreme ideas of who we must be in order to be “perfect”…
You are not in an existential crisis, you are in existential curiosity. Be aware of the distinction and transcendence that awaits…
Do you deny yourself of love? Do you deem yourself worthy of affection?
Are you chasing others in order to elevate your worth? Are you pursuing the elusive and stuck in fantasy?
Do you trust your heart? Can you trust others?
Men! Be predictable in behavior. Show up being safe in how you deal with challenge and difficulty. Yes, you can still be mysterious and spontaneous in your sexuality, love languages and the way you treat your queen. But be consistent in how you show up to arguments and the needs of your partner.
The traits that are attractive and appealing when dating are different to the traits needed when maintaining a meaningful and long-term relationship.
This is not to say that what we were initially attracted to doesn’t still apply years later. It most definitely does. When we first meet we are yearning for passion, excitement, we often value an outgoing personality, confidence, and the spontaneous pursuit and chase of discovering the novelty of each other.
A green flag essentially means that you feel safe to proceed, pursue and explore with a deeper level of vulnerability, openness and curiosity. Your guard is down and you are ready to not only show the better parts of you but perhaps even the parts that don’t look that flash.