In my relationship, friendship has been the cornerstone of our persistence, willingness and desire to come back to loving each other from a new and whole place, not past patterns and conditioning.

Do not take your friendships for granted… In the realm of intimate relationships, friendship lays the foundation for love to flourish. Relationships are more than just a hormonal rush, explosive sex and unicorns and rainbows. YES, they are all these things and more.

Healthy, sustainable relationships are forged at the crucible of willingness and challenge. Where you both become willing to face the unknown, the pain, each other’s fears and difficulties in order to create a new version of each other as individuals and as mateship.

Relationships are about a symbiotic union, mutual sharing, the triumph through challenge and the daring to risk the union in the face of battling with each other’s wounding, fears and pain.

Friendship allows us to endure, providing us with mutuality in reverence, trust and respect. When our own “stuff” (past pain and wounding) becomes activated or triggered in the presence of your lover friendship states:

“No, we will not project, we will not blame, we will lean in, we will be respectful, we will honour and we will endure with healthy boundaries”.

Establishing friendship in any deepened intimate union allows us to transcend confusion, allows us to remain patient enough for long enough to extract the value out of a hard situation.

Please do not take for granted making the time to become friends. At the beginning of relationships, set your intentions, delay sexual union, get to know each other’s hearts and minds. See each other for who you truly are, laugh, have fun, enjoy novelty, challenge each other and overcome these challenges, develop history together and practice mystery.

This will build attraction and forge depth in your relating.

One is glad to be of service.

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author