Junk or Connected Sex?

Do you numb yourself during sex? Is your sex “junk sex” or connected sex? Are you liberated during sex or do you feel restricted in your expression?

Junk sex is surface level. More often than not (not always) junk sex is the human soul in denial, avoidance and suppression. We seek deep connection and intimacy and somewhere in our minds we have come to the conclusion that it can be attained with copious amounts of physical sex only.

This sex is not grounded in a merging of or union with oneself. There is no deeper context of vulnerability, open- heartedness, emotional dialogue and presence. It is about completion, the attainment of a goal. The goal being orgasm.

There is no reconciliation of two beings coming together in a Union that is them and also beyond them. This sex is devoid of depth, history, trials, tribulations, triumphs and healing of each others wounds through choosing to focus on our own.

Junk sex distances us and leaves us wanting more of what we think is giving us connection but is really creating more distance in what matters to us – being seeing in freedom.

Sacred sex requires all forms of readiness, awareness, openness, timing, truthful communication and such presence and willingness. When we create and make love we move beyond superficial avoidance and in to potent possibility. Sacred sex requires ritual and care, it is outside the realm of the ordinary and it requires time for us to “arrive”.

Creating love and romance is bringing a wild and open heart to a willing and erotic body. I am not saying lust plays no role in gratifying, joyful or happy sex, it simply just isn’t the only thing going on.

“Good sex” celebrates all that you have shared, risked, won and accomplished together and separately. Real sex involves deep trust. When the people involved experience history together and profound challenge they mature in Union. Only those who are deeply mature can deeply love.

The sexually awakened individual slows sex down. The sexually unawakened are looking for their next hit, they rush and are all about streamlined sexual gratification without integration. 

One is glad to be of service.


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author



A New Man Rising

The man of the future has not quite arrived as yet. In partitioned and compartmentalised fragments the essence of this man is here – present on Earth. n fact, he has always been here dormant in his glory…

The Density Of Anger

I can tell you about the physiological effects that excess anger and frustration has on the body. I can tell you how excess stress hormones released throughout the body due to a cognitive spotlight focus of anger damages our neurones.

I can tell you about the feeling of not being in control and how longterm, this affects negatively our sense of self and understanding of who we are. I can tell you that the less we self-regulate the more we have that feeling of not being in control of the direction of our internal monologue, stories we feel ourselves and pain we feel.

‘Fighting’ The Resistance

Do you feel unsafe in your life? To feel safe, immerse in the unsafe, familiarise yourself with this state so that it no longer becomes the unknown. Make the uncomfortable deeply comfortable and from here you will flourish….

Sexuality – A Tool For Enlightenment

There are various expressions of our own sexuality that when we explore deeply, we realise are infinite and simultaneously magnificent. We forget that sexuality is not only a physical construct or expression but has the capacity to take us somewhere of depth and realisation…

The Self-Revering Man

The man who respects, trusts and reveres himself is the man who stands in vertical awe of his own being.
This is not arrogance but rather ‘aware confidence’ and a deepened connection to self that supersedes doubt, fear and confusion.

Share This