Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker

Where Do You Place Your Kindness?

Some of us find it easier to serve a global mission, donate blood, feed a starving village or be physically present at a natural disaster, rebuilding the homes, lives and social structures of others, then to be present to the intimate and immediate needs of a loved one…

To apologize sincerely and simply to our beloved when we (more than likely have acted from unconscious wounding) have hurt them (whilst simultaneously hurting ourselves) is at times near impossible… Why? Why do we struggle to own our pain, actions and behaviours towards others?

What would it take for us to be kind, connected and centred in our approach to others, with respect to how we deal with others, communicate openly and connect with others? What would life feel like if we were pushed to our emotional edge and witnessed and experienced an internal struggle, yet chose to be compassionate and kind?

What if we experienced pain in our mind and heart and as opposed to being unconsciously reactive, we were compassionate and we began with ourselves? What if we looked at the world and the actions of others and we chose to respond to life with kindness, truth and patience?

What if we recognised that others are coming from a place of implicit hurt, internalised frustration and deep pain and at times they are unable to regulate their emotions? What if it was a scream for help, an opportunity for us to show up and simply be kind?

What if in this kindness, we provided a new way of being and feeling for our loved ones and in the process liberated ourselves of our own possible trauma, suffering and addictions to pain? The interesting part of all this is that we are so deeply interconnected that we do not even realise the impact one singular gesture of kindness can hold over a hostile situation.

We are so scared of being kind to those we care for. Being vulnerable can be viewed as being weak. But really, is this truth? Is vulnerability not an opportunity for growth, expressive release and the letting go of tension? To be vulnerable is to feel free, to not be burdened by the tension of not communicating our inner power, to couple this with a sense of safe expression shifts and unlocks paradigms within our own being that were previously restrained by fear and apprehension.

When we choose to place our kindness in our immediate environment and give ourselves to another’s fear, irrespective of how uncomfortable we may feel, we live a more open and inclusive life. A life worthy of embodied pursuit and a life with far less disempowerment.

One is always glad to be of service.

 

Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker
Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker
[fbcomments]

Childhood Neglect

We suffer when we neglect ourselves and when we do not own who we are. So many of us grew up in disconnection from our families, unprotected from those we were meant to trust, unseen and unforgiven. I experienced hardship like many of us – physical abuse, violence, volatility in the home, shame and projected judgment.

The Innate Mystery Of The Divine Woman

There is a great mystery that permeates our consciousness and that is the mystery of the creative energy. As a society, we have shunned what we do not understand…

Man

Thousands of years of compounded behaviour has resulted in the unhealthy and extreme posture and dominant masculine expression rampant in the majority of men today. By describing accurately who we have been is not perpetuating a myth or holding ‘ourselves back’. We are holding ourselves back by fracturing our psyche by not looking at ourselves from a place of holism…

Junk or Connected Sex?

Do you numb yourself during sex? Is your sex “junk sex” or connected sex? Are you liberated during sex or do you feel restricted in your...

How You May Be Unealthily Co-Dependent

Codependency keeps us in old patterns of reliance, low self-worth and playing safe. The patterns around codependency rely on others to feel “good”, safe, “whole”. This sensation and yearning of wanting to feel complete or whole reside within all of us.

Share This