As I sit and watch, observe the world around me behave, watching my nephews eat and people stroll, walk and run past I can’t help but to feel the world around me…

Ever since I was a child I could really FEEL the world, people and their pain. I would feel their pain in order to not feel alone in the world. I also experienced so much of it myself that I wanted to help others with their pain.

As I reflect deeper on this I see there was definitely part of me projecting my suppressed pain in order to feel better about myself and share my suffering so I wasn’t alone and the other parts were my intuition really “seeing” what was below the surface of often what was pretend for people.

Society told me overtly and in more subtle ways that feeling others and myself in this way was not acceptable especially for a man. So I numbed it and stepped into a more aggressive version of myself, hating on myself whenever I was to feel the hurt of myself or others.

With all of the deep work I have done, the psychological and spiritual “pits of hell” I have often traversed I seem to be at a crossroads still… and we often will be when we choose to expand. Side note. The work doesn’t end per se.

I am now choosing what I perceive, intuit and sense as truth on a deeper level without judgment, doubt or from an unhealthy place. The crossroads is there is still an internal battle of breaking the old patterns…

That’s part of the journey, awakening and the growth. I accept where I am and I am excited for the possibility this acceptance brings…

One is glad to be of service

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author