Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker

That Gentle Touch

What an incredible feeling to hold the life force and essence of another in the palm of our hands. Men… that touch, that cradling of our beloved’s head in the palm of our hands. To be present to that level of trust and surrender is a beautiful gift. One that can leave us determined to be grander versions of ourselves.

But how do we gain the confidence and the presence to be open to such an honour. To learn deeply, grow profoundly and immerse intensely in such a gift that is the trust and opening of another to us…? What an amazing opportunity to grow through the holding of another’s heart. To hold their heart in our hands – their history, their joys, their pains, their suffering, their triumphs, their pride and the fears.

Literally in our hands. The power of deliberate touch. The transmutative and transformative power of physically holding another closely – wow… What an opportunity to shift internally what ails us also. This inner softness captured in the palm of our hands as we become deeper and deeper captivated by the gaze and surrendering of our beloved…

What does this mean to be honoured and trusted in such a way. Can this surrendering be viewed as pressure, as pain, as too much responsibility? Can some of us as men shy away from this surrendered intimacy and not know consciously why? Yes, we can. I was once one of these men, who yearned to hold dearly and sincerely, authentically and openly this gentleness, this trust, but could not…

It is not until we delve deep within who we congruently are – the fullness of our shadow self, inclusive of all the experiences that we have accumulated – unseen and seen parts of self that we may be able to then contain the beauty, wonder and sweetness of surrender the handing over what matters to most.

Love as it presents itself in vulnerable exchange is all we truly have in this world. It is what otherwise lights our darkened path when we are deeply distressed, disorientated or confused. The only way to truly appreciate, revere and be humble to this exchange is to know our own being. To have taken our own minds and hearts to our ‘edge’. To explore the unknown and equilibrate our pain points…

When we do this and choose to embody this wholly, we can listen with our hearts openly and we can feel the truth profoundly. Then and only then, we can feel the full touch of our beloved. We can hold them in our hands knowing we are capable of weathering any storm that may arise, in fact we can grow together, bond and bind our paths in the most loving way.

Now, this requires intention, attention, effort and the moving through of great challenge, but the reward is reprieve, immersion in to truth and a life worthy of embodiment. It is here, that this holding becomes powerfully clear. This holding now becomes energising, transformative, inspiring, heart opening and revelatory…

Men, holding your beloved – in all of their vulnerability, surrender, trust, connection, openness, heart and soul is an honour bestowed upon us. We, therefore must choose to ‘do the work’ within and shift the limitations, clutter and patterns that hinder us from traversing depth, the mystery and the eternal truth of ‘sacred merging’ through embodied union.

Yes, we are ready…

One is always glad to be of service. S.Sifandos.

 

Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker
Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker
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Better OUT than IN

My beautiful grandmother would tell me to never hold farts in. In Italian, she would say often “Always out, never in.” I remember this distinctly, and then she would burp and I would laugh hysterically. She was the best! I then would run around farting and get excited to go to the toilet haha! I now often think about the real life implications of ‘out’.

You Have A Throne

Your throne awaits you.

Own your throne.

Cherish your throne.

Be your fucking throne.

Why ‘One Is Glad To Be Of Service’

Many years ago, I watched a beautiful movie called Bicentennial Man with Robin Williams. An unfolding and beautiful story about an AI Robot who is an enigma and somehow carries consciousness, awareness and metacognition. The journey unravels that he continues to grow and wishes to ‘BE-come’ human. What does it mean to be human?

Man

Thousands of years of compounded behaviour has resulted in the unhealthy and extreme posture and dominant masculine expression rampant in the majority of men today. By describing accurately who we have been is not perpetuating a myth or holding ‘ourselves back’. We are holding ourselves back by fracturing our psyche by not looking at ourselves from a place of holism…

The Unrivaled Essence Of Man

What we often forget amongst rhetoric and discourse that is harmful towards the positive attributes of man is that we are in a time and space of immense transformation.

We have entered a period of relating where man and woman are uniting under the banner of sentience. Under the perspective of connectedness, wholeness and unification.

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