“Shit Or Get Off The Pot”

Rise in to certainty! The above phase basically means either commit and be all in or get out of the way and stop pretending. In relationship, this translates to three key things:


Make a decision, stay with it and grow with it! As men, we are told to be discerning, carry clarity in our actions and know what we want. I agree with all of this and more. In an ideal world we communicate our truth with complete knowing, self-belief and wisdom.

And herein lies the problem. So many of us do not ‘know’ who we are. We live to the tune fabricated by another and are never living to our own truth, therefore never really knowing who we are and what our ‘substance’ is?

Men, one of the most attractive qualities you posses as healthy masculine men is showing up to the world and to the women in your life with certainty and clarity in what you want. Commitment to your path and journey is everything!

This makes us safe, open and transparent. We are not dangerous if we are known by others and the only way we can be known to others truthfully is if we know and revere ourselves. This lends itself to trust.

We exude trust, we embody it, we live it. Our actions, our word, our thought – every deed carries certainty and an unbridled commitment that allows us to be see for who we truly are. We are not doubted, nor are we feared – we are revered.

We are not volatile, nor unpredictable. We are respected and we trusted. We are not condemned, we are not perceived as wrong. When we trust in ourselves, believe in our path and act in integrity we are liberated.

We bring this all-encompassing freedom to life and to our relationships. We become attractive, we become appealing – we become FUCKING MAGNETIC! Ask any woman if she is excited by a man who knows himself and is in deep integrity! We live on purpose. We are not confused or scared little boys expressing from unconscious pain.

To get to this place, our hearts must be open and we have traversed the unchecked fears that have once resided within us. Men, the greatest gift you can give you loved ones is that of a clear and certain commitment to self.

One is glad to be of service.


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author



Suicide Is Never An Option

We call suicide selfish. Most men do not see it this way. Men isolate and are isolated for many reasons. People who genuinely feel loved and needed rarely commit suicide. Men are more likely to commit suicide returning from war, being unemployed, isolated in life, losing their life savings or if they become incapacitated. Man need love – from women, tribe/community, his children and himself.

A Healthy And Embodied Masculine Man

Your ability to be a HEALTHY and embodied masculine man will be dependent on how RESILIENT and TOUGH you are WILLING to be.

Let’s just speak to two expressions or components for healthy masculinity. Sure, there are many – presence, compassion, confidence, clarity, honesty, truth, openness, vulnerability, decisiveness, introspective, magnetic, robust, adaptability, expansive, singular and so much more.

Love Is Conditional

There it is. I said what basically we all do. We all place conditions on the way we care for others, okay, well the VAST majority of us do. I know I have & so what, where to from here? Are standards, ideals, values & conditions bad?

If your partner is physically or emotionally abusing you consistently should you remain in that situation with no indication of change because you wish to have ‘unconditional love’?

An Open Apology To The Feminine – PART II

Men, we are not less than for apologising. We are not weak, meek and passive. When we own who we are, we are liberated, empowered and free to grow and expand. Forgiveness (seeking or accepting) is expansive and is a sign of fucking strength.

Loss – Wholeness – Love

What is loss? Does loss even exist or is it all semantics – a game of words used to describe what we truly do not understand? Can we explain love, loss, gain, pain, and growth? Perhaps we cannot fully explain these notions…

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