What Is Your Goal in Sexual Union?

Purely orgasmic-orientated sex keeps us in a vicious and addictive cycle of emptiness and incompleteness that requires “refilling.” Keeping us stuck in perpetual desire and release. Everything we now do drives us to maintain these unsustainable peak experiences, further distracting us from true deeper Union.

This obsessive desire to explosively ejaculate and orgasm becomes our crux. It becomes so addictive and we base so much on who we are and our value in this event, that like a drug we crave and need more of it to function. We then become monotone in our sexual expression. Experiencing only superficial connection masked as depth.

We equate the short-lasting peak experience to the be-all and end-all of the human potential. We are sadly mistaken. There is nothing wrong with orgasm. We have just been conditioned to believe that this is all there is. The truth is that there is more to us.

Exploration of the self and the other allows us to know ourselves at a greater capacity. We avoid this because part of that knowledge is not flavored sweetly. It is confronting. It is heavy and painful. We fear it and therefore fear ourselves and therefore distract with convenient peak experiences.

Take the time to relax the nervous system, the mind, and the heart. Slow the exploration of the other and yourself down. Be in the moment and do not attach your sexual exploration to an “outcome” that must be complete in its revolution.

For me, when I have slowed down and gazed deeply into the beloved that knows and sees me I have simultaneously come face to face with bliss and pain. The pain of being seen has been foreign to me and has revealed layers of pain from the past.

Layers to be witnessed and released. But breaking through that initial layer of the fear of intimacy has been difficult. Why, because intimacy has been dangerous for me in the past and I spent most of my life in superficial sexual interaction attempting to make the pain and avoid the truth of release.

We don’t like change as humans… And would rather remain in the pain of the unknown than enter the fear of the unknown…

What are you willing to face within yourself? 

One is glad to be of service

STEFANOS SIFANDOS
Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author

[fbcomments]

KEEP READING

There Will Always Be Peanut Butter

At times we often gaze into the sky, into nothingness, to the stars, to the horizon, to apparent emptiness.

In these times of deep and sincere gazing, we question our place and path. We abstractly enquire into the nature of our existence, of our actions and our feelings.

The Perpetual Taking

To take consciously is to give abundantly…

For a man to be adored by his woman means the cosmos to him. For a man to be loved, sincerely cared, seen and nurtured allows him to burst in to thriving in to the universe – amplifying his power.

For a woman to be witnessed, served and known for who she is and the gifts she bares in to this world is liberating. For a man to support and hear his woman frees her expression wildly. For a man to be non-judgmental is opening for his woman.

Tapping Into Your Feminine

The internalized embodiment of feminine consciousness by man has been a welcoming change as it has allowed both men and women to see each other at greater depth. A more profound appreciation has transpired towards women and this has bridged the gap of isolating our differences.

Is Your Intensity Coming From Insecurity?

Are you chasing him or her because you think ‘they are the one’ and you can’t do any better? Are you giving ALL of yourself to another and minimizing your needs? Are you placing the power of decision in the palms of another because you don’t back yourself?

Are you intense in your emotions because you feel out of control? Are you desperate because you believe you are unworthy of love? Are you needy because you can’t meet your own needs for love, validation and security? What drives the intensity in your being?

Judgment, Disgust & An Open Heart – Expression In Intimate Relationship

Judgement is a tool for separation, for denial of the wholeness of what we are. In intimate relationship judgement hinders our ability to connect openly and lovingly.

START WITH YOUR LOVE BLOCKS

Complete this assessment to uncover the exact blocks preventing you from attracting and experiencing the love and intimacy you truly desire

Share This