Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker

Our Focus Becomes Our Greatest Super Power

Imagine for a moment that if what you chose to focus on became your absolute reality in that moment? Remain with me for a moment here please. Imagine your thoughts were able to master your body’s faculties – the manner in which you physiologically responded to life – they can.

We become angry, frustrated, in pain, we feel the depths of sorrow. Emotionally we are perturbed and disturbed by this. We begin to shut down, become neurally tensile, feel disconnected and hyper-focus on this extension of ourselves that is suffering.

Whilst there is value in this (to learn from, grow and transmute what does not serve through context, reference and attention), to remain here for too long is not healthy. To have stress hormones circulating our bodies perpetually and constantly is not healthy for our own vitality and mental state. There is another way.

We have the capacity to be more connected to our thoughts, emotions and mindset than we may know. If we feel completely disconnected, we have an opportunity to go into it in a more objective and neutral way. Yes, there are times when the trauma or the fear is a little too much, here we may need a more supportive and calculated approach.

Now, in these highly strung or tensile moments we can just breathe to regain mastery of our physiology. Our bodies and minds work as one, it is just that we are generally quite disconnected from the intimacy of this connection and wholeness that exists within us.

When we breathe purposefully and deliberately we engage fully our entire being. When we take our minds to a place that is more connected and an internal place where we actually focus on what is working in life or something that inspires us profoundly we literally shift that deep discomfort we feel in our bodies.

When our bodies are then relaxed, without such tension, we not only think in a more creative and expansive manner – we are able to create harmony in our thought patterns, balance in our expressions and clarity in our movement. Our relationships function from a place of openness and transparency as opposed to restriction, underlying shadow elements and pain.

We project less, literally are freer in our bodies and are able to express with authenticity and prowess. We are present to the pain, yet not controlled, nor paralysed by it. This is a power we can all tap in to. We must understand this intimate connection between mind and body – body and mind. It truly is one in the same.

The fastest way to change our state is to change our physical environment. However, this can also apply to our internal state of thought processes and cognitive focuses. Our focus can literally influence our emotional states of being. Perhaps choosing articulately what you choose to listen to within the chasms of your mind is the most freeing act you can engage in…

One is always glad to be of service.


Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker
Stef Sifandos
Relational Alchemist, Community Builder & Changemaker

Sacred Sexual Union


When we are having sex we are literally INSIDE of another human being. This level of intimacy at a physical level is profound. It can open every other faculty of being we have access to.

For this degree of sacredness to exist, we must both exist. For the feminine body to feel safe to be this exposed & open she must trust. To be trustworthy, we must fully open as men & be transparent.

The Dynamics of Relationship

It is often rare to create a relationship that is truly free. Freedom defined as our willingness to be present to all that unravels within the relationship, whilst also been not attached to the fruits of our efforts.

This does not mean that we are careless in the relationship, it actually means we care at such a depth that we have merged the selfish with the selfless. We are grounded in our expression and our energetic imprint allows those in our lives to feel that they have wings.

Acknowledge Your Pain

There is no shame in acknowledging our pain.

When man hides his grief with anger we all suffer. I was excessively angry for so long. Blaming others for my repeated “misfortunes”, snapping at those I loved and hating on everything that went “wrong” in my life.

There Is Only Love

In a world where injustice has become an arbitrary term and deep, disconnected fear of connection, the ability to be authentic in lieu of being harshly judged and relational pain fills our lungs like an awful stench all we truly have is the embodiment…

Focus On The “NOW”

Stop reminiscing about and being attached to the pain and fear of the past, so that you may justify and validate the circumstances of you NOW.

We are so attached to what is familiar that we are unwilling to let go of what no longer serves us I order to preserve an ideology or way of being that feels safe because we have know it all of our lives.

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