Loss – Wholeness – Love

A Game Of Loss

What is loss? Does loss even exist or is it all semantics – a game of words used to describe what we truly do not understand? Can we explain love, loss, gain, pain, and growth? Perhaps we cannot fully explain these notions, postures or happenings, but what we can do is begin to embody symbolically what they are and what they truly represent, and this leads us towards wholeness… 

By enquiring, by searching for meaning, we are expanding our scope of understanding and connection to these precious states of being. By opening our hearts, souls and minds to the possibility of seeking for truth we begin to absorb the power of these experiential states. We learn through immersion, we ‘gain’ through direct experience. Without this pursuit of wisdom, we shall never embody our potential, so whilst we may not ‘know’, it is valuable to be tenacious and persistent in our seeking of truth.

Searching For Meaning

By searching for loss and by attempting to find meaning in loss we realise eventually that loss does not exist, but rather transmutation of one state to another. Whatever is felt and experienced in life remains with us, it does so as we continue to grow. What changes is that what was once our dominant expressive state takes a back seat to something of greater service to us and to others within that space and time. 

This service opens us to greatness, to expansive awareness and enlightened consciousness. It is in this place we realise the immense value of what once was our dominant expression and is now dormant or non-existent within us. We needn’t hate or despise this state, it has evolved us to where we are but know that our past needn’t define our present or future and that ideology, belief, relationship, state, expression, behaviour and habit served it purpose. It placed in a position to be ready for the next spiralled phase of our own immersive evolution. 

The Truth In Loss & Love

When we feel or think we are losing in love, have we really been able to observe the value that came from those deep feelings? Our physicality (inclusive of how we feel – our emotive states) is an extension of our ascension (of our spirituality). With this in mind it becomes imperative we acknowledge the value and purpose/s in every loving affair. 

It is true, defining and attempting to cognitively understand something as cosmically deep as love is a fruitless task. But this undefinable and abstract experience needn’t be defined; it must be felt, played with, moved in to and experienced in its fullness. An attempt to ‘explain’ love is not all lost and in fact, the more we play with this connected state; the more we embody its true essence. Love is loss, loss is still sad – it is a human construct needing to be felt. In a dualistic world loss is a part of love and love is beautiful, therefore so is loss. Loss must be felt; loss must be loved. If we are to move in to a form of ‘illogical’, non-dual, abstract, whole love we must first grasp dualistic love. This becomes our starting point. 


We Are Actually Not Dying

Loss does not signify death, nor does it signify something ‘bad’. It is an opportunity to grow. As sentient and conscious beings – beings that embody an animus (a unique, yet connected and whole ‘soul spark’) we must embrace the wonder, gratitude and value in all that we are privileged to feel and experience. 

Yes, a challenging undertaking. Not easy, not always accessible and feels horrible. But not impossible and we are resilient, tenacious and opportune beings. We have great capacity and potential. Being persistent in this space will allow us to expand. 

As animated beings, expansion and growth are our primary objectives. How we do this varies, but gratitude, immersion in to the whole of self and feeling and experiencing the entire spectrum of life will allow us to grow. How we then interpret these experiences will transmute our being.

The Beauty Of Love

Love is beautiful…

Loss is equally beautifully… Loss allows us to feel a void, in this void, this nothingness, this space, this mystery – we are able to connect to aspects of self that are hidden. But the many of us do not realise is that this absence and darkness within self is part of the whole. When we ignore, we polarise, wholeness can only be achieved by embracing and embodying all that we are. By loving all that we are…

Are you ready to love the darkness?

I honour the complexity and depth of your journey. You are ready, simply say yes and deep dive in to the darkness, it shall liberate you beyond your wildest imagination.

One is glad to be of service.


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author



Doing The Inner Work

Firstly, this isn’t a gender thing. It’s a people thing. We are often really scared of change.
This is often a tough one in relationships. We want people to change with us, to do what we do, try what we try, feel what we feel and share similar interests.
At a primal level, it is our nervous system feeling safe in the presence of familiarity. Additionally, when we share similar paths, values and interests we are all part of the “in-group”. In social psychology, this is crucial to one’s feeling of being safe and surviving.

The Authentic Art Of Courting

When courting or in the pursuit of intimate relationship we place the grandest version of ourselves forward. We present what we perceive to be the what the ‘other’ desires, needs or wants…


Thousands of years of compounded behaviour has resulted in the unhealthy and extreme posture and dominant masculine expression rampant in the majority of men today. By describing accurately who we have been is not perpetuating a myth or holding ‘ourselves back’. We are holding ourselves back by fracturing our psyche by not looking at ourselves from a place of holism…

Shadow Alert

I have a confession. It’s very real for me and has been for some time. This morning I realized the potency of my being and my behaviour…
For many years, intensified violence and aggression were my go-to. I carried internal rage and suppressed trauma that often (not always) expressed itself in physical violence, drunkenness and self-loathing.

Embracing differences

We speak to the differences in men and women not to segregate but to celebrate. This celebration allows us to honor ourselves and each other. The truth is we are in this together.

Divine Union is something that can only flourish when polarity is felt to be merged. When sacred masculine deliberate intention meets sacred feminine compassion and opening.

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