Judgment

Judgment. I’ve been doing this more than I care to admit. I feel I’ve lost myself in it. Not seeing beyond the veil. Only the surface. Having been blinded by my own preconceptions & ideas. Thinking fast (or minimally) & feeling slower.

I was conversing with a friend speaking to celebrity crushes & whilst I’ve never really had a celebrity crush, I quickly passed judgement to those that do. At that moment, I literally jumped out of my body & was observing my behaviour.

There was arrogance in me. As if to say that those with crushes &/or obsessions were wrong, weak-minded & superficial. My tone was sharp, negating & distant. Something didn’t feel right about this.

I sat with my “opinion” taken as fact. It wasn’t fact & I began to reflect on my comment “I never really had crushes”. I disguised that with “well, I admire people, but don’t obsess over them, they are people”. Whilst this is true (as an adult), this wasn’t true as a child & I was hiding something here.

What was I hiding? I went into this whilst talking with my friend. I was hiding the fact that I did have celebrity crushes. As a child, I would watch TV a lot to “escape” & find refuge in adventure and fantasy. I idolised action characters & heroes. Why? To give me some reprieve from the violence, volatility & pain at home.

Why would I deny this in this conversation & not just admit that and judge others for idolising people? Because it would conveniently hide the pain of my childhood & help me forget. Ah, the coping strategies we develop as children. They keep us safe AND they don’t always serve us as adults.

I took some moments to forgive me, be humbled, take ownership of the truth, step into less judgment, more acceptance & open-minded & heartedness. We are not perfect & we are all on our own journeys. With all the “internal reflective work” I do in various expressions, I still get stuck & still need to reassess who I am.

I appreciate this kind of effort & willingness to grow. It used to be slow or not at all. These days I can catch it quicker & be surrounded by healthy individuals reflect that back to me.

One is glad to be of service.

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author

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We ‘think’ that we are not as good as why we are. We devalue ourselves, we minimize our power, we place ourselves lower than what we are.

How do we come in to a space of self-reverence? Where we know our power and we needn’t question our abilities when it comes to expressing our truth?

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Divine Union is something that can only flourish when polarity is felt to be merged. When sacred masculine deliberate intention meets sacred feminine compassion and opening.

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There is no shame in acknowledging our pain.

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You know the dialogue… “Not smart enough, not strong enough, not popular enough, not wealthy enough, just not enough. I covered the not ‘enoughness’ with either retraction or aggression.d

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Do not take your friendships for granted… In the realm of intimate relationships, friendship Lays the foundation for love to flourish. Relationships are more than just a hormonal rush, explosive sex and unicorns and rainbows. YES, they are all these things and more.

How can we truly be happy with who we are? How can we truly be happy without guilt? The insight in to this is quite simple…