Home in Retrospect

It has been really difficult being back here “home”… What is home? It has changed for me so much. The last few years have been turbulent, revealing, painful, healing and empowering. Being back in this place has disorientated me in many ways.

Yes, it has been nurturing to my soul, my dear friends, blessed life long connections, family and loved ones, yet I feel displaced. Have you ever been somewhere that felt so familiar, yet you feel you didn’t belong anymore? I am here.

So much “stuff” coming up. I am observing the nuances play out in real-time. I am feeling the pain of reliving aspects of my past that I no longer align with. I see myself being my father and embodying his dense and judgmental traits.

I see and feel myself being numb to compassion, judgemental to difference, lacking empathy, being mean in my attitude and negative in my outlook. I have been occupying a space that is unwilling. I have been out of integrity and I have felt disconnected from my beloved. Projecting upon her and not feeling, holding, or truly seeing her. I have been inconsistent and unsafe as I am riding this roller coaster.

I have been obsessed with my pain and have chosen not to budge it, as I have allowed my environment to slipstream me back into older versions of self. Lessons and deep teachings I am now unpacking and open to moving through. Layers that are revealing themselves.

“But I have done this work, why more?,” My ego asks… “Because the work before this has now gently opened the door to this new and profound layer of depth”. Responds to my soul. Reluctantly I step into the truth and own who I am being. Disconnect, short, even aggressive in my tones, impatient, non-compassionate and ill-understanding.

The situations presented to me are giving me an opportunity to break generational patterns, to be free of what no longer serves me and to not repeat cycles of unhealthy intimacy. I am answering this call. I have been in fear and stubborn, however, I am here now. I do not hate my past. I revere it. I am grateful, yet in the moments of pain, I have been distant. No more. I choose grace and I choose to move into all of it.

Where in your life have you been hesitant, resistant and in pain? It is time to break free. Join me. Together, with awareness + intended and sincere action we can change our pasts and honour our present.

One is glad to be of service.


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author



The Underestimating Of Female Power

As a collective energy and historically men have disregarded the sacredness of women – the authentic power they bring and the presence they contain.
The narrative has been one of discrimination, segregation, divide, oppression and minimisation…

The Penetrative Man

Masculine penetration is GIVING of oneself to the world with presence, posture, confidence and certainty. In order to do this and be this in the world we must know and importantly, trust ourselves.

Man is penetrative by nature. Part of his core essence is to penetrate deeply in to the world. To penetrate with his gaze, his heart, his soul, his mind, his breath, his posture, his presence and his sexuality.

There Is Great Depth and Presence In Man

It exists.

It is there.

It is presence, it is stillness.

It is beyond the superficial and it is beyond the stigma.

Love Learns From The Past

In a relationship, we often let our past infiltrate our present. We allow our unconscious and unresolved wounding to dictate how we behave, how we treat others and how we see ourselves.
The ego simply wants to protect us, to keep us safe and help us remain in what is familiar to us. The ego-self is not “bad.”. The ego is simply grounding us and what it knows, keeping our bodies minds and the emotional being safe and away from harm.

Stop Avoiding Intimacy

STOP! We spend so much time running from what we fear. What we are essentially running from is our ability to feel closeness, connection and deep intimacy.

We all yearn for it – unconsciously and consciously in different ways. Brothers need brotherhood but have fear of being judged, ridiculed and not accepted by their primary in-group. They also spend so much time distracted and in ‘doing’ energy.

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