Be In Existential Curiosity

You are not in an existential crisis, you are in existential curiosity. Be aware of the distinction and transcendence that awaits.

I shared this with a client not long ago. Your highest self is asking to be witnessed, not from a place of immature ego, but from a place of remembrance. We will often create chaos and apparent confusion in our lives to lead us back to clarity and truth (the human experience learns through contrast). If we can be resilient enough to withstand these storms, we reconnect to our true north – who we’ve always been.

Think of it this way. Your mind-heart-soul-body complex is unfamiliar with not experiencing drama in life, therefore anything other than “chaos” is unknown and unfamiliar and considered a threat. The body lives in the past and wants to remain with what it knows (comfort = safety), so it does what it can to distract and come back into what is unhealthy homeostasis.

You then create more drama, pain, old fears come up, you become protective in your life, you blame others and shame yourself. Anything you can do to remain in the familiar patterns of being. You have thought about change and living a fuller, whole life but this thought is foreign.

You doubt it and you doubt yourself. It’s overwhelming – change can be. You become fearful, your brain’s protective strategies kick in and you’re reminded of the past and how change is painful. You choose inadvertently to remain in what you know.

What was genuine curiosity becomes a crisis because you’re being forced to choose what you know (familiar, safe – albeit often painful and not desirable) with what you don’t know (the mystery and possible pain and so on). “Better the devil you know” says the brain.

You struggle to trust what is unfamiliar and the body creates a crisis associated with a potential change to remain in what is more known (safer). You cycle this and you continue to find yourself in a disillusioned state. How to shift this paradigm?

Tell yourself you are safe. Place a hand on your heart and navel and breathe slow. Connect the mind and body and slow down your thoughts. Be more curious. Ask the internal question of “what if”? Challenge yourself and learn more about all of your edges by taking yourself there and showing yourself that you can still survive. Ice baths, ask that person out, move state, start writing that book, find new friends, start a new career, create a new hobby, travel more, etc.

You’re not alone. You’re ready for change.

One is glad to be of service

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author


Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author



Mindful Monogamy – An Open Enquiry

Let me begin by saying that there is no ‘wrong’ and no ‘right’ or ‘boxing in of labels. When choosing for you what is in alignment for your intimate and interpersonal romantic relationships careful consideration of so many factors must come in to play. Any experience we choose to engage in if not mindful carries less of an impact in terms of how we may grow, release and transform…

Sacred Sexuality

The practical sense of REAL and TRUE sacred sexuality is supporting and seeing each other through uncertainty and vulnerability.
Sacred sexuality allows us not to hide, to be open in our bodies.
Sacred sexuality allows us to trust. This frees us so we do not harbour pain and tension.

My Unhealthy Shadow Relationship To Food

Men experience food addictions and body issues too. I used food as a means to escape. To leave my reality. It made me feel good. I felt connected, alive and SAFE with food. Food, like the movies, would momentarily take me away from a place that was violent, volatile and what felt to be unsafe.

Debunking 5 Myths Around Being a Man

Whilst there are many ideas around what it means to be masculine and what it means to be a man in today’s world, many of them are either based on outdated cultural norms or are distorted and unrealistic. Why? Because, we are placing far too much emphasis on what man ‘should’ be in an idealistic sense and not actually placing attention on the gifts of man.

Intimacy – A Dance Between Lovers

“The intimate and blissful dance between taking & being taken allows us to know ourselves at such depth”. This is contrast dynamics/polarity dynamics & the song of the masculine & the feminine, which resides within all of us.


Complete this assessment to uncover the exact blocks preventing you from attracting and experiencing the love and intimacy you truly desire

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