Knowing completely the path of our purpose, living on and in purpose requires mastery.

In order to begin a journey of mastery we must be clear on who we are and what we wish to be, whilst choosing consciously to move towards desired states of being that align with our highest truth.

It should be known that just like natural ecology flourishes and thrives on biodiversity so does the human being with relation to life experiences, preferences, purposes and interests. When we engage in multiple interests and learn to integrate them in to a life that we consider worthy and connected we thrive. When we have multiple purposes or sincere inspired visions and interests we flourish. There is nothing ‘wrong’ with having multiple purposes in life. Society often dictates to us otherwise but we are made to experience.

The complexity of the brain and the Universe would not have us being monotonous in our experiences. The gift is to realise what we value and then embrace that fully! Exhibiting clarity through courage in our lives will assist us greatly here.

Clarity in life provides us with hope and an opportunity to live fully our potential. Developing laser like clarity bestows upon us an ability to live authentically. This article will articulate the importance of clarity and discovering your purpose, whilst providing you with specific techniques and tools to live a life on purpose devoid of nagging fears, doubts and confusion.

When we are living on purpose we are consumed with clarity. We have a clear vision for our path and for our journey. Our dreams occupy our minds, joy, connection and unity occupies our hearts and our being and our journey has momentum. This momentum is generated through clarity in self, vision, purpose and our dreams.

Life can be challenging and whilst we grow profoundly on the border of challenge and support, knowing this and maintaining a perspective of growth only takes the edge off the pain experienced with inner transformation. Whilst growth of the self can only grow when we are challenged if we do not have strong and resilient coping strategies during these periods of difficulty we will suffer immensely and lose our ability to continue our journey of growth and personal development.

Knowing our purpose or purposes with great clarity in this case can be of tremendous assistance in providing us with insight and wisdom along our journey. It is being convicted, tenacious and diligent in this area that allows us to experience the value of challenge.

The path to knowing our purpose in life can be discussed in another article. This article is about cultivating clarity, which effectively lays a powerful foundation for connecting to our purpose. Know though that when we live our purpose we are living fully, completely and wholly. This is such an authentically empowered state to live in that if every living, conscious being strived for this state we would live in a highly inclusive and endearing society.

To experience clarity, we must experience challenge. This is a natural part of our growth and it is growth that is what is essential here for living on purpose. When people ask me “what is the meaning of life”?

I often respond as follows:

“Firstly, it is not a singular question, but rather a pluralised question. We must be asking what are the meanings of life? I then state that there are primary and secondary meanings to life. A primary meaning is destruction – growth – expansion. Expansion of every aspect of the self – one’s mindset, belief systems, ideologies, models of reality, behaviours, relationships, etc. In order for us to grow and expand however we must destroy and breakdown what was before it and in order to do this we must have clarity on why we wish to transmute, transform and change. Here knowing and being profoundly connected to our purpose is of great service to our path.

Clarity, lays an empowering connective foundation to living on purpose. There are so many ways to gain clarity in life, below are 8 powerful ways to cultivate laser like clarity:

1) Develop mental toughness

There is a distinction between what is known as mental toughness and mental resilience. Both are required with a mind-body integrative praxis. We can easily replace the word ‘mental’ with any other of the four bodies of the integrated human sphere. We can experience and cultivate spiritual toughness and resilience, emotional toughness and resilience and physical toughness and resilience. The reality is we experience all of this simultaneously when we move through testing and challenging experiences. We often associate more readily with our minds because we predominantly communicate through this medium. We think thoughts, which occupy our awareness, and language is the cornerstone of conscious communication, therefore our focus is placed here.

Know though, that all four bodies are functioning collaboratively and simultaneously at all times, in fact this is the only way. One area or extension of the human sphere may be dominant but all four bodies are always working.

Mental toughness is our ability to move through perceived pain across any domain of life. The depth and clarity of mental toughness we are able to implement during stressful, arduous, difficult, painful, testing and trying times will determine the efficacy to which we are actually able to transcend that impermanent state of being. Mental toughness allows us to move through and endure these painful experiences of life.

Without mental toughness we would retreat and choose to not move through that challenging experience, we would become dormant (stunted in our growth and compassionate understanding of the world), non-courageous in our behaviours whilst never choosing to immerse in life, maintain a polarised view of reality and never truly experience the wonder and deep teaching’s of life that come from transcending, shifting and choosing to move through difficulty. This would ultimately then translate to lost experiential and holistic understanding and benefit of self and one’s circumstances.

We would lack an ability to move with, through and understand painful experiences throughout life. This would polarise our opinions and understanding of the world – setting us ‘back’ with respect to our own growth and evolution.

When we are not experiencing directly and observing our reality in completeness, fullness and wholeness we are ‘losing’ in life. This is the vast importance of toughness. It allows us to move through, continue, persevere and proceed through these painful times. There is much learning, teaching, growth and expansion at the proverbial evolving end of each of these challenges. To truly benefit and feel we must move with and through all aspects of life. The importance of experiencing the wholeness or entire spectrum of reality is crucial to our psycho-emotional, psychosocial, physical and spiritual development and growth as interconnected human beings. Toughness bestows this diverse experience upon us.

2) Develop mental resilience

Mental resilience or resilience is our ability to recover from pain, difficulty, challenge, stressful stimulus to the organism (physiological, mental, emotional, spiritual and social). This recovery is not so we can experience ‘the same’ pain again (in fact all experiences are unique and individual and whilst we can experience similar life circumstances there are always subtle differences and discrepancies based on the multitude of external and internal variables contributing to that state). But rather so we can learn and grow from our experiences. The ability to recover from difficult life circumstances is crucial to our survival. Think of it this way.

Those who have experienced a great deal of perceived pain only to commit suicide or end that pain in the only way they feel they know how is an inability to recover from that pain. With this comes an inability to gain great wisdom and learning from that difficulty. This is where mindfulness and self-awareness (alongside specific coping strategies) are of tremendous benefit and use to us. Note: I am not simplifying or reducing suicide. Suicide is a complex matter of the organism that is inclusive of multiple variables and influences. Those who choose to suicide are at their perceived end point and feel ‘choice-less’ in their lives.

Our ability to recover allows us to reflect, go deep within, gain the value, perceive the value, apply the value and cherish the value to carry with us and add to our life skills. We generally repeat cycles of growth and expansion where we collapse ourselves and rebuild and redefine ourselves. However, we can only live in this space when we have a capacity to recover. The proverbial and experiential point of no return is not an ideal state to be in and indicates disconnection from our empowered selves.

3) Realise & live your values (hierarchy of preferences)

Understanding and knowing your own values opens up a greater possibility of creating meaningful, fulfilling, long-lasting relationships – not only with others, but importantly with yourself.

Before you begin linking a previously uninspiring activity to your purpose, or linking your values with someone else’s, you must start by identifying your own values, which are unique to you – there is no ‘wrong and right’ with values, they are simply your own. We must begin to live according to our own values, become conscious of what is important to us and take active ownership of this rather than being heavily influenced by ‘outside’ forces. The values we hold and their hierarchy or ranking determine how we perceive (selectively attend to) and how we act in (selectively intend upon) our world. They also, therefore, determine the results we produce, the quality and depth of life we live, the clarity we experience and ultimately, the direction we take in our lives’.

4) Practice being courageous

Courage is often a measure of our self-esteem, our self-worth, our will to persevere and the value we place on ourselves. Courage is what separates those who live their potential and those who do not actualise their potential. It shows in our belief systems and is generally associated with treading ‘the difficult path’. But it is this difficult path that inspires us, forces us towards growth and grants us a capacity to experience the authentic fullness of life. It can be also be an unconscious act of boldness driven by an incessant need to create both inner and outer homeostasis. Beyond this, courage can be considered the conscious decision of a person to act with clarity despite being confronted with ‘danger’.

Thus, courage can be related to and intimately connected to belief, will, understanding, focus, clarity of one’s being and danger. Courage cannot be felt with out feeling an element of risk also. There is no heroism without the perception of a possible loss of some sort. We cannot speak about courage without thinking about losses, fear, pain points and some form of victory (even if it is purely internalised). Courage differs from imprudence or madness by its results. The courageous act saves lives and gives hope to the hopeless (inclusive of the hopelessness that at times dwells within. It can often be equated to a rare act of self-sacrifice for the greater health of others – therefore making courage quite a selfless proposition. And it is an immersion in to these postures that assists us in becoming clear with our lives.

5) Simplify & De-clutter

When simplify our lives from experiences that do not serve us we are empowering ourselves to live life from a perspective of clarity. Simplification leads to deeper connection and understanding to self. When we de-clutter our environment, friendships, ‘stuff’, beliefs, etc. we allow space for a clear mindset and outlook to reign within us. Practicing stripping back what no longer serves us is a commendable practice in self worth.

6) Diversify – so we know what we don’t want

When we choose to diversify our experiences, we are essentially screaming to the world with clarity what we want and by default what types of experiences, friendships and environments we do not want in our lives. Actively choose to engage in experiences that challenge you, that are new, perhaps scary and that you know nothing about. This praxis will draw you closer to an inner clarity that is ultimately liberating.

7) Be Attentive

When we consciously choose to pay attention to ‘everything’ in life, we gain insight and clarity in to who we are and what we want from life. Where our attention goes, our energy flows. Being attentive – particularly to inner state of being (our thoughts, emotions, feelings, responses, reactions, etc.) can allow us insight (clarity) in to what we value most and importantly the type of people we wish to be. This conscious and acute attention paid to the deeper chasms of our being allows us to know ourselves and therefore be empowered to choose experiences that are in alignment with our highest good.

8) Experiment

Fail forward – fail fast – fail frequently. Failure is feedback in to who we are and what we are choosing to focus on. The more we experiment with life, the more we draw ourselves closer to what is of value to us and what serves us. Actively experimenting with different ways of being, thinking, feeling, behaving and responding to life allows us to live in a space of heightened clarity. Because we very quickly realise what states of being are going to serve others and us with the most efficacy. If you have an ‘old problem’ continuing to rear its ugly head approach it with a different mindset, perspective and attitude and observe the results.

So what are the benefits of having laser-like focus and clarity?

• We spend less time dwelling on the past and more time focusing on the present. We are in the here and now and are able to deal with life in ‘real time’ as opposed to being disconnected and not attuned with ourselves.
• We live with meaning and fulfilment. When we connect our purpose to our everyday actions with a clear intention we are living authentically. Meaning and fulfilment in our actions lay empowering and congruent foundations for experiencing sincere and connected happiness. I do not know anyone who does not wish to be happy.
• We become clear with who we want in our lives and what type of people we wish to attract in to our immediate circle of influence. We know what we want from others with great clarity. This clarity allows us to draw in well-intentioned and well aligned people in to our journey that we can also be of service to.
• We realise how we can be of service and where our energy is best spent and maximised. Having clarity in life allows us to maximise our experiences and choices around how we spend our valuable time.
• Clarity allows us to love with greater depth. We know what we want. We wish not to waste our time loving a situation, person, or ideology that does not resonate, nor reciprocate that love. We are then in turn loved deeply, congruently and authentically.
• We have higher levels of self-awareness. We are more astute to our surroundings and we know what we want from life and ourselves. We know what our preferences and values are and spend more time living in alignment with them.
• Clarity allows us to experience openness with life. Being open is considered a desired state of being that bestows upon us courage, inclusivity, curiosity and strength to mention a few qualities.
• Clarity in every area of life strengthens our intuition and connection to self. When we posses clarity, we posses power. This power is what allows us to gain insight in to our truest state. When we live this state physically we are strengthening our capacity to be insightful and intuitive with our life choices, leading us towards greater levels of sustained wellbeing.

All paths lead to clarity if laden with intention and attention…

One is always glad to be of service.

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author

In the very short time I have been present on this planet I have had (like many of us) what I call a range of diverse and deep experiences. I have been plummeted in to the depths and chasms of despair, suffering and pain, yet I am still here.

I have clenched fear and faced demons, death and sorrow head on. I have been to places within myself that no human should go, I have had resolving highs to match feelings of destitute, yet I am still here.

I have suffered blows, felt continuously rejected, not been met where I feel I need to be, not understood, felt ever so isolated and alone. In despair and in deep physical, emotional, spiritual and emotional pain all at once, self-pity parties in abundance, yet I am still here.

I have risen the wave of ecstatic, blissful joy, have had my life enriched by the most amazing souls, have touched God, felt God, become God and have had wisdom revealed to me that has plummeted me further in to the chasms of exploration and I am still here.

Darkness, light and all in between has my tongue tasted. ‘Failure’, unworthiness, humiliation, that feeling of one’s heart sinking thousands of feet below the surface of the Earth – yep, I have felt that oh too many times, yet I am still here.

Abuse, violence, solitude, feelings of being alone, loneliness, rage, aggression, being told repeatedly ”you are wrong”, that posture of isolation, that has been my friend too many times, yet I am still here.

Savage break ups and enlightened break throughs, confusion beyond measure and clarity brighter than the brightest day. Not being able to release fear and pain, my dreams shattered, my insecurities and feelings of ‘not enough-ness’ reinforced and devastated by horrible self talk, yet I am still here.

And through all of this I am deeply grateful. Through all of this I have connected to the humility and appreciation amidst the devastation. Upon deepened reflection no experience has ever been wasted or lost.

Trust and receptivity have been two of my greatest lessons (amongst many) and even when I forgot how to trust I have been led to trust and yet I am still here.

Even when I have not known where I am going, there is still a glimmer of trust that I am held, that I am supported, that something, someone has my back… In profound uncertainty, I am still here, as I grow so does the kindness, wisdom and compassion.

With more potential insurmountable difficulties lurking perhaps scattered through sustainable joy and revelation, I once again shall persevere, grow, learn and adapt as I have before. And be supported and held ever so deeply by so much of life and those in my life…

No-THING is ever wasted and no experience ever lost. YOU are powerful beyond measure, lean in to your strengths and triumphs and know that life is always on the way and never in the way…

One is always glad to be of service.

STEFANOS SIFANDOS

Relational Alchemist, Speaker & Author